My experience with the Spiritual Gift of Mercy

Attributes of the gift of mercy

More people have the gift of Mercy than any other gift. It balances all the other gifts as in the case of balancing strengths and weaknesses. To reflect upon Paul’s assertion, 1 Corinthians 13 is a description of godly Mercy.

“If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but I do not have love, I have become as sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.  And if I have prophecies, know all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so as to move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.  And if I give out all my goods, and if I deliver my body that I be burned, but I do not have love, I am not profited anything.  Love has patience, is kind; love is not envious; love is not vain, is not puffed up; does not behave indecently, does not pursue its own things, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices in the truth.  Love quietly covers all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.  Love never fails. But if there are prophecies, they will be caused to cease; if tongues, they shall cease; if knowledge, it will be caused to cease.  For we know in part, and we prophesy in part;  but when the perfect thing comes, then that which is in part will be caused to cease. When I was an infant, I spoke as an infant; I thought as an infant, I reasoned as an infant. But when I became a man, I caused to cease the things of the infant.  For now we see through a mirror in dimness, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I will fully know even as I also was fully known. And now faith, hope, and love, these three things remain; but the greatest of these is love.”

They don't like confrontations for themselves, but become tigers when someone they love and care about is hurt, or hurting.  They have the ability to feel atmosphere of joy or distress in a group of people. A person with this gift who does not recognize it will be easily distressed.

They have a tendency to be attracted to people having emotional or physical distress.  They have an ability to project themselves into another person’s problems. Their desire to remove hurts and bring healing generally prevents them from looking for benefits in the pain felt by the person.

They have a greater concern for mental distress than physical distress because of their knowledge that inner feelings are of utmost importance. They will always reach out with love and caring to soothe and heal.

They are sensitive to words and actions so as not to hurt anyone and when hearing anything critical, they react to it. Their tendency to react harshly when intimate friends are rejected or hurt makes them a champion in causes. Their sense of loyalty causes them to feel another’s pain and this trait keeps the rest of us in touch with feelings as none of the other gifts can do.

They sense genuine love and have a greater vulnerability to a sense of lack of love. They are more easily hurt and more frequently hurt. They need to feel that “protective care” from their mate and will back off if hurt. They understand commitment and will give it unconditionally. They have a need for deep friendships with deep commitments and they have a need for genuine awareness of commitment.

They measure acceptance by physical closeness and quality time together. They will be attracted to other like people. This is the only gift where two people who have it will be attracted to one another. All the other gifts seem to pair off with other gifts such as an Administrator with a Perceiver or Teacher, or a Giver with Exhorter, etc.

Mercy people will avoid firmness with a person in counseling until they are made to see the benefit to that person.  They must realize they need to temper their gift with wisdom. We must not interfere with God when someone is in the middle of being broken or we might prolong or even hinder the process instead of helping it along.

They have a great ability to detect insincerity immediately and will form close relationships or reject those displaying insincerity and insensitivity. Although, they are quick forgivers because they understand hurts. Sometimes, they confuse sympathy with empathy.

Characteristics of the gift of mercy

“And behold, a certain lawyer stood up, testing Him and saying, Teacher, What shall I do that I may inherit eternal life? And He said to him, “What has been written in the Law? How do you read it?” And answering, he said, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with your entire mind, and your neighbor as yourself."  And He said to him, “You have answered rightly; do this, and you shall live.” But desiring to justify himself, he said to Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” And taking it up, Jesus said, “A certain man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell in with plunderers, who both stripping him and laying on blows, went away, leaving him being half dead.  But by a coincidence, a certain priest was going on that road; and seeing him, he passed on the opposite side.  And in the same way, a Levite, also being at the place, coming and seeing him, he passed on the opposite side.  But a certain traveling Samaritan came upon him, and seeing him, he was filled with pity. And coming near, he bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. And putting him on his own animal, he brought him to an inn and cared for him.  And going forth on the morrow, taking out two denary, he gave them to the innkeeper, and said to him, Care for him, and whatever more you spend, on my return I will repay to you.  Who, then, of these three seems to you to have become a neighbor to the one having fallen among the plunderers?” And he said, “The one doing the deed of mercy with him.” Then Jesus said to him, “Go, and you do likewise.”  Luke 10:25ff.

This story is so deep and has so many lessons, but we're going to look at the lessons which point to the gift of mercy. Some of the characteristics of this gift are implied here, others are spelled out. We'll see if we can find them all.

1. Has tremendous capacity to show love.

The Samaritan didn't care if this man was Jew, Gentile or Samaritan. His actions showed that he cared he was a human being in dire need. God says that the love of man will grow cold in these last days. The Gift of Mercy is greatly needed.

2. Always looks for good in people.

The Samaritan did not wait to find out if the man was of good character or not. He just helped. Often times a Mercy person will bend over backwards to give the benefit of doubt to anyone they come in contact with. The grumpy person is "just having a bad day"; the rude person is "just not paying attention". This person will be courteous to a fault until they perceive someone else is being stomped on, and then all the fangs and claws come out in defense of that person.

3. Senses the Spiritual and emotional atmosphere in a group or individual.

The person with the Gift of Mercy predominant will understand this trait without explanation. He can sense emotions quite accurately. This gift will surface as the dominant gift when the Christian has just suffered something tragic such as the death of a spouse or divorce or some unusually tough times with the kids. I believe that God gives us this during the time of grief so that we will not be focused on our own problems but will become "distracted" by the problems of others. It is a coping mechanism.

4. Is attracted to people who are hurting or in distress. Just like the Good Samaritan was.

Time tells all things.  They are willing to be used by someone because you can’t tell if someone is a freeloader or down on their luck until they’ve had the opportunity to do better.  Once you’ve given them the opportunity, in the weeks and months following their actions tell the truth about their intentions.

5. Takes action to remove hurts and relieve distress in others.

They will show up 10 minutes early for an “emergency need for a ride” and wait an hour without complaining.  A mature Mercy person will only do this a few times before being “busy” on all future occasions though.